this is what we call a paradox

ok so here is cute, girly quote:

"The only people you need in your life are the people who need you in theirs"

Let's extrapalate this a bit shall we?

If you wait for someone to need you in their life and they wait for you to need them in your life.....you're both going to be waiting a fucking long time. Don't get it? Try this: If everyone in the world stands on a line and turns to the left, then you will see the back of their heads. Now, if your goal is to see their face, by this logic (even if everyone turns to the right from the current position) you will never be standing face to face with someone. Someone has to go first!

Moral: Girly, feel good things are fucking stupid.

oh this will be fun.....

Okay, so I found a total time waster called stumbleupon.com......below I have listed a bunch of shit I found awesome, maybe you will too (I don't care if you do or not, my self entertainment is clearly more important....).

1)Bulls advance-dominated the last game
2) Blackhawks lost-what else did you expect after losing 9 players
3) I lost my bluetooth, bought a new one-not liking it (I have funny shaped ears and it won't sit well in them)
4) An interesting logical theorem about the existence of God (not saying I agree, but it is interesting to think about:

If God is willing to prevent evil, but is not able to
Then He is not omnipotent.
If He is able, but not willing
Then He is malevolent.
If He is both able and willing
Then whence cometh evil?
If He is neither able nor willing
Then why call Him God?

5) Classic Man: The underdog. Odds stacked against him, he grinds, struggles, fails, but eventually succeeds.
Never, never, never quit-Winston Churchill


http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1WjbBr/artlung.com/smorgasborg/how_to_tick_people_off.shtml

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1dO7IJ/photography.nationalgeographic.com/wallpaper/photography/photos/best-pod-august-09/cuban-tree-frog/

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/74Y6lL/www.owned.lv/15067/10-cents-a-minute/

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2MYVze/consumerist.com/2010/02/the-greatest-craigslist-room-rental-ad-ever.html

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2Yg3Mx/awesome.good.is/transparency/web/1102/beer-map/flat.html

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1F2lgK/www.pattishomepage.com/read/beer.htm

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2GVdnK/aceonlineschools.com/30-awesomely-bad-school-portraits/

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/9R7sEv/elliotvredenburg.com/storage/we-want-beer.jpg%253F__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION%253D1268394959425

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/5YwucC/macromeme.com/cat/alien-contact.jpg

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2xuQAR/www.youmightlikethis.com/2011/01/this-is-america/

Fair winds and following seas......

oh hey....i have a blog

heeeeeyyyyyyy

so this is awkward....i kinda completely forgot i had a blog for a while.....whoops!

so new rule: since i have no free time, i will be doing this once a week. it will be more entertaining for the viewers since i can combine a whole weeks thoughts to write about. it will be better for me cause i aint that creative.

so my weeks thoughts:
1)baseball! (read CUBS!) so glad there is baseball back on the northside. the cubs are currently .500 and this sounds about right for cubs baseball as i remember it. they slowly plod along, then drop to 5th place when it really matters.

2) the bulls are struggling but 3-0 versus the pacers. Indiana sucks for almost everything. no one wants to live there. the sports suck. the town sucks. people wear jorts (jean shorts). nothing positive about the state, except maybe big ten sorority girls.....

3) back to baseball: what is spring to me? baseball tonight back on ESPN and the Sports Center top ten plays of the week. Top ten plays aren't really all that great without baseball involved. WEB GEMS BITCH!

4)I just saw an add for the fast and the furious 5.......fucking kill me know. how is this still a movie series? hasn't vin diesel made a reality show yet? oh wait, he sucks too much FOR REALITY TV! the sad part is that 5000 asian kids will still go see it......america is FUCKED!

5) I had interviewed for 7 hours monday.....i was unaware what amount of time it took for me to lose my voice and spastically cough while trying to talk.......that time is 7 hours.

6) Hawks are gonna win to bring the series to 3-2 in the canucks favor: FUCK CANADA-Even worse that Indiana.

7)Be clear on the rules. I played a trivia game with a girl on a date this week. We were unclear on the rules of the game for the first half of the game and we showed up halfway through......lost a 25 dollar gift card of free booze-own a map, ask how to play the game.

8) if you have a man and you love him, watch a man movie marathon with him (while keeping your mouth shut during the damn move, i.e no questions)-Dirty Harry, Godfather, Brian's Song, Field of Dreams, Casino, etc.

That's all for now.
Classic of Man: D-Rose. HE. GETS. SHIT. DONE. And his is humble in his greatness as well.

Thoughts? Comments? Questions? Riddles? Algorithims?

Fair winds and following seas......

FLIGHT QUALIFIED BITCH!

So I have been away for a while.....did you miss me? Of course you did. Since I have been absent so long, I will update you on my current state of affairs:
1) I had my initial flight physical a few weeks ago. This affair was supposed to take from 6am til noon. In true military fashion, I didn't leave the base until 430 pm that afternoon. So THAT was a long day.

2) At said physical, I apparently had a high density tissue mass in my lungs that the docs wanted to make sure was non prohibitive to proper military duty. So THAT took a while to get done. I had to schedule blood tests to make sure that I wouldn't end up on dialysis resulting from the contrast dye for the CT to follow. The drive back to base took longer than the blood taking itself.

3) The CT was fun. 730am, 5am wake up call plus work after. LONG day. I got a disk with my images but they mean nothing to me as I don't know what I would be looking for. I later found out that I am A-OK.

So as this post as long over due, I found my two favorite quotes in the world (I think) on my old computer (Oh yeah, I bought a mac book air. Pretty cool, but I don't do enough with a computer to be one of those savvy tech mac dudes).

"Look at you. You're exhausted, hungry, thirsty, cold, wet, and miserable. Your body trembles, from soreness and fatigue, and even as I look at you, you are swaying on your feet like you will collapse any moment. Now you can feel it. The spirit that will make your body like iron wrapped in silk, your attacks as deceptive as a needle hidden in a ball of cotton. Now, you are ready for real training."

"The best things in life are beyond money; their price is agony and sweat and devotion...and the price demanded for the most precious of all things in life is life itself, the ultimate cost for perfect value."

 
Now, for the important part: Classic Man!


Classic man today is not a particular sense though it was a particular man who fits my description (I just don't know who it is...). The classic man today is the man who figured out that you can drink a cow's milk. Why, you might ask, is that person (obviously a man) a classic male? The reasoning is this: Men dare other men to do very stupid things. Eat HOT peppers, sleep with fat chicks, light bags of poop on fire on doorsteps....and drink stuff that comes out of another animal. I imagine the conversation went something like this (loosely translated from some earlier language, of course):


"Hey, whatcha doin?"
"Nuthin....look at them four legged, spotted things over there....."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, they got them things hanging down there.....like nipples."
"Ha, dude, imagine a chick with that many nipples....she'd have like 3 times as many boobs."
"Mmmmmm......booobs."
"Yeah and the littler spotted dealys suck on em' "
"What you think comes out?"
"I dunno, but I betcha a pig and two goats you won't drink it....."
"Hell no, I ain't drinking that shit!"
"Why not, you afraid?"
"I'm not afraid, I just don't wanna."
"No, you're afraid.....pussy"
"Fuck you!"
"Nice come back, you just are too scared to do it..."
"Well, why don't you drink it?"
"Cause I dared you first!"
"Fine, fine, but if you tell Bill about this, I swear to God, I'm telling the whole camp that you banged fat Margret then cried afterwards and she had to sing you to sleep."
"Fuck you man! I was totally wasted and couldn't see straight...."

That's all for now. Hope you all enjoy me being back as much as I do....


-Fair winds and following seas.......

floggins molly-tobacco island

so.....here we are, yet another monday-a wonderful way to spend 1/7 of your life, i suppose.

i was initially going to do a piece i call "a one sided conversation I have with the world while trying to avoid talking to that kid I went to high school with who is doing checkout at jewel osco." But it's not finished yet, so you gotta wait.

So instead, I am dedicating the next 90 minutes to you. Your hopes, dreams, desires, sins, penances, should haves, should have nots, and general hypotheticals.

Here is what I've got for you:

It's monday night, I'm listening to flogging molly on pandora, with a dip in and this is what comes to my mind-YOU HAVE A FINITE TIME LEFT ON THIS EARTH. My time is more likely than not even more compressed as I choose to partake in habits that I am sure negatively affect my longevity. I drink; often to excess, I used to smoke, I dip (quitting soon though), I don't sleep enough, I work too much, I vacation too little, and I worry (blame the Catholic guilt, I suppose).

And what does that lead me to? Jack shit. Why does it lead me to jack shit? I don't have a fuckin clue. I'm sure it shouldn't but it more than often does. So instead, I consider what I've learned over my 24 long years of living.

-I have a cat that is bulimic and another that is afraid of the dark.
-I don't have many answers to almost any question
-I am not overly quick witted
-I might be unable to die-time will test this theory
-The whiskey always burns me going down and the women always hurt me walking away, but I return to both hoping that the next time might be different
-I've learned that when I'm dead, I want my body to mangled and torn and used-open casket funerals are for Popes and Presidents, I have a life to live
-Something given is never as valuable as something earned
-To whom much is given, much is expected
-Most people from the Northeast annoy me
-College professors don't want you to use Wikipedia as a resource because most of the time is has all the information you'll need and is correct
-Always ask "Why not"
-Do something nice for someone everyday
-Everyone is smarter than you in some way, you just gotta stick around in the conversation long enough to figure out how
-Shoot first, ask questions later
-Rock bottom is never really that
-You may be on the top of your world, but you're on the bottom of someone else's
-Never, Never, Never Quit
-Most doctors don't know shit, first or last in their medical class, they have an MD after their name
-I haven't been able to "woo" anything outside of a cheeseburger-and even that left eventually
-If you're gonna make a mistake, go ahead and enjoy making it-just don't make it a second time
-The human body can accomplish amazing things-it's the human brain that often gets in the way
-A cold beer in a hot shower is of the best things in life
-So is the feeling of skin to skin human contact
-Everyone has an agenda, get used to it
-Something may not be worth your while, but it's well worth someone else's so fucking appreciate it
-I love a good smelling woman
-Simplicity is the key to happiness, take one task you are doing and focus all your energy on it, meditate within the task and do it to the best of your ability
-We are all connected through some greater force, energy, or whatever. There is no use running from it-it is the basis of human connection and life

That's all I want to write tonight. I've learned more, but I'll save it for a later date. No Classic Man because I think it would cheapen whatever it is that I am pseudo trying to accomplish here (I told you everyone has an agenda).

-Fair winds and following seas....

what a shitty day

Today was a miserable day.

Work was crap! There are some bitches in the world and they don't wanna let you finish a sentence.

However, I stumbled upon this quote and I think I love it:

Inflamed with the study of learning and the admiration of virtue; stirred up with high hopes of living to be brave men and worthy patriots, dear to God, and famous to all ages.
-John Milton

I really don't have much to write about tonight. My running workout was a bitch, 10x200m. I was sucking wind like a motherfucker. I got through it though which means I'm one day stronger than I was yesterday.

Classic Man of the Day:

Clint Eastwood! Classic Man! He is the eqiuvilant of what a man should be in both real life and his movies. He ultimately respects women, look I'm all for equal rights (despite the obvious biological differences that some women choose to ignore for some reason) but I do have a few male rules. One of them, possibly the most important, is that you always respect a woman. This basically translates to the fact that if you are a man, you NEVER strike a woman, if you do, you deserve to die a slow and painful death. Also, you open the door for a woman, you give her your seat, etc. Look, I get that women want to work, earn a living, get paid the same, etc. but I am a chivalrous man. I still believe in do things in the classic male sense, I guess. Think back to the 50's or earlier, that's how you oughta treat a woman.

Anyway,

That's all I got tonight.

-Fair winds and following seas.....

Gobbeldy gook

Well,

I return to my blog to see a lack of outrage over my (probably off color) Muslim joke yesterday.....I assume that's a good thing (maybe not due to clear reflection of lack of readership).

Today was an average day: Grinded through work (corporate BS and all-cause somehow paying someone full time is still cheaper than the time I waste doing shit to fill the empty position), got an okay workout in: cone drill-squats, lunges, diamond pushups, wide pushups, star jumps, crunches, leg kicks, and some other shit all while running laps around a park.

I also, officially today, came out of the closet as a.....fatalist. You thought I was going to say homosexual, right? WRONG! I love the female body too much and enjoy it's ability to swing, sway, and contort itself into too many interesting positions in which to have sex with to be a homosexual. Not that there's anything wrong with that......

Speaking of which, time to disspell a probable rumor about me: I am not, necessarily, against gay marriage. Here's why:
The act of marriage is a religious sacrament, and by the constitution of the US, we all know that religion and state are to be separated. Therefore, what you are really doing, outside of your particular belief structure, aka what this means to Uncle Sam, is that you are allowed to file a single tax return. THAT'S IT!  Look, 50% off marriage ends in divorce, if the homosexual community wants a piece of that, I say let them have it. The only way I am, probably, outwardly against this idea is if a study is conducted and we found that a majority of children from single sex marriages turned out to be serial killers, suicide victims, etc. Other than that, there are enough shitty opposite sex marriages that ruin a kid, so why not let the gays have a chance?

Any who, back to my point, I am a fatalist. What this means, TO ME, is that there isn't much you can control. Mainly I use it to not worry about the past. Sometimes I still do, but look, you can turn shit back into salmon dinner, so why worry about things you can't control. You do what you can; what's best for you, husband, wife, kid, etc. and move on.Maybe it was the right choice, maybe it was the wrong choice. The point is, whatever choice you've made, you have to deal with what the consequences are, not worry about what the other choice would have brought.

The caveat to this is that human beings on a large scale, mainly psychologically, don't change. What this means is that over a general world population, history is bound to repeat itself, if we fail to learn from it the first time, i.e. Genocide, Terrorism, bad relationships, etc. What the root causation of those issues is, however, is clearly up for debate.

Hmmmm and to think, I had nothing to write about 30 minutes ago......that's what inspiration if for.

Classic Man Time:

No real guessing here, but this guy is a man's man. My take on it might be a little different than the average male though. 1) He does fucking awesome shit. Go kill a boar and roast it, go chop off a snake's head, make a fire and survive for a week in shitty weather. 2) He's smart enough to know that he's filming a TV show and that man has evolved to sleep IN BEDS. I know he got caught staying in hotels and in generally populated areas, but look, you gotta respect the guy that says: "I fucking evolved from a monkey to walk on two legs and have conscious thought, I'll sleep in a BED when I can find one. Besides, I know very few college coeds that are willing to go back with a man to his moss bed under a tree and shiver/sweat away deadly mosquitoes all night; THE MAN HAS TO GET HIS.

Anyway, if you don't like Classic Man, go fuck yourself.....if you're lonely tonight, maybe you already are?

I will leave you will a parting quote:

"It is usually more important how a man meets his fate than what it is."
-Karl Wilhelm von Humbold

Until next time boys and girls.

-Fair winds and following seas......